I've Succumb to the Infamous Color Code

For the past couple of days I have been reading The Color Code- A New Way To See Yourself, Your Relationships, and Life by Taylor Hartman, Ph.D. The book is basically centered around the idea that all personalities can be categorized into four separate groups: Red, Blue, Yellow, and White. Reds being motivated by power, Blues motivated by intimacy, Yellows motivated by fun, and Whites motivated by peace.

You're asked to take this 45 part "personality profile" that determines where you fall in the personality color spectrum, then read into each individual color's natural instincts, strengths and weaknesses to further solidify which color you represent. After taking the "personality profile" I ended up with 11 Red, 11 Blue, 11 White, and 8 Yellow... which really did not make sense because that only adds up to 41. So after (more carefully) recounting, I had 11 Red, 12 Blue, 11 White, and 10 Yellow. As you can see, my results are pretty level- which really doesn't give me insights into any of my motives in life. But-as I said before- my buddy Taylor Hartman suggested that I "read on" and see which color I relate with most in order to find my most dominant personality. And I did just that.

To be completely honest, I thought I would relate most with Whites, the peacemakers. People I know have told me that I seem like a White because they are known to be compatible with others, agreeable, tolerant, accepting of whatever life brings them, and relaxed... which seems to fit me. Yeah, no, apparently not. I am Red-Blue, the most difficult combination merely because it contradicts itself entirely. They find themselves in a constant struggle between seeking power and searching for intimacy in relationships. But here's why I thought I was white (as put by Hartman), "Secondary Colors can skew our personalities so that we no longer act according to who we innately know ourselves to be. I have worked with Reds who have strong secondary Blue traits, and they appear to be White. Rather than accenting the strengths of their Red and their Blue gifts, they abandon the battle and act White. Of course, this leaves no real winners. We don't get their Red or Blue strengths, and they don't experience their core motive of power with Blue accents of compassion and quality." Huh, this man seems to know his stuff.

Recently I have found myself avoiding confrontation and biting my tongue in arguments when- to be completely honest- my instinct is to fight back with "facts and logic"(Red!). Then later I find myself feeling guilty about thinking- or maybe saying- certain things in said arguments (Blue!). Story of my life. Being this particular personality also explains why I:

1. Thrive on competition,
2. Am loyal to relationships,
3. Insensitive at times and too sensitive during others,
4. Detail conscious, borderline OCD.

And as a child:
1. I took charge of the situation when my parents were gone.
2. Was capable of bouncing back in a negative environment.
3. Felt extremely guilty about minor things.
4. And remember impressionable things as far back as age 2.

Basically, I feel so dumb for not being able to see any of these things for myself. I was talking to my mom about it the other day and she basically said, "Of course you're Red-Blue, so am I, why do you think we butt heads so much. We're so much alike in the way we fight." So true. We have a very explosive relationship. We are intense about loving eachother, and intense about fighting eachother. But anywho...

I apologize for such an extensive blog post but I really am sooo intrigued by this book and my findings. Read it. Really. It is giving me such helpful incite as to why I am the way I am and why people around me act the way they do.